I was lucky enough to find my purpose early, and to find it right at home. My family was not only close-knit and God-fearing, they were also hard drinkers and sometimes fighters. They’d get together on the weekend and it was like a contest to see who could drink the most and who could cause themselves the most embarrassment. One Saturday night, they were at it again, carrying on and talking about things that don’t matter. I started saying to my sister that I didn’t want to grow up that way. I wanted to make a difference in the world. I wanted to make it a better place, not just for myself, but for my family and everyone else around me. I wanted to be a history maker and a world shaker. I wanted to make an impact on the neighborhood I grew up in. I wanted to help kids who needed a hand up and out of that “almost” place. I realized that I didn’t have to be the way my family had always been.
My sister said she thought that was a great idea, but she was smart enough not to stop there. She reminded me about the friend of hers who won a silver medal at the Olympics in swimming. She didn’t do it by dreaming about it. She would hit the alarm clock at five in the morning and go to the pool to practice. Then after school, she was back in the pool again for another couple of hours. I used to wonder if her hair ever had a chance to dry.
The point my sister was making was that if I was going to accomplish anything, I had better get desperate about it. I would have to do a lot of things that were new to me and even new to my family. There’d be difficult days ahead of me. In fact, they were much harder than I had imagined they would be. But, I had taken the first step. I had made a decision that I was going to live my life by design rather than by default. I had decided to take control of my destiny. That good desperation provided the key to change: motivation.
I was given divine desperation, which is not panic, not weakness, not frenzy, and not worry. It’s determination to do what needs to be done in order to be the person you want to be. I was young enough that I didn’t stop to think that it would be hard, that there would be so much to learn and so many things to do. We could all use more of that child-like faith and fearlessness. The most important thing I can tell you is that you have all the talents and tools that you need to become a world shaker and a history maker. Pause for a minute and realize that you have them and then embrace the God-given confidence and desire to put them to work that is already within you.
6 Comments
God is Perfect Love!
Thank you for sharing your testimony you’re an inspiration! I see what the Lord has done in your Life like He is doing in mine! But most of all thank you for being a fighter not giving-up!!! You’re a Blessing to all!!!
MR STOREY THANK YOU FOR THE INSPIRATION. I AM 39 YRS OLD AND FIGHTING FOR MY DREAMS. I TOO GREW UP WITH FAMILY ON DRUGS AND ALCOHOL. NOT TILL ONLY TWO YEARS AGO THAT YOU HAVE BEEN COMMING TO CORNERSTONE CHURCH IN SAN DIEGO HAVE I BEEN AROUND PEOPLE WHO SPEAK INTO MY LIFE THAT I CAN BE SUCCESSFUL AND LEAVE A LEGACY FOR MY FAMILY. THANK YOU
God bless you Tim and may God’s anointing continue to increase on your life. I know that you talk to thousands maybe even millions especially by the internet but God sure uses you to encourage me. I have watched you for years but I don’t see you, I see the God inside you; I see the drive; I see the anointing that can only come from my Heavenly Father. I was first saved in a Kathryn Kulhman service (too many years ago) but I still remember one sermon that she preached; it was about Elijah and Elisha, the double portion anointing. (II Kings 2:9) After the teaching there in Stambaugh Auditorium, she asked who wants the double portion anointing? I nearly jumped over the balcony. I began to cry out to God for a triple portion anointing. I did not want to be like everyone else and that burning desire has never left me. I had decided that if I have to go into the darkest jails for God to use me, then okay Lord…but Tim, something is stirring inside me that I can’t explain. All I know is that I want God to use me…I am so hungry for souls. Please understand that I don’t covet your anointing, I am hungry for the anointing that God has for me…my destiny. Sometimes I wonder if ministers realize that as they yield to God, chains break loose in the spirit; even melt in the fire of God!
Be blessed man of God and keep yielding.
Rane
When I read this personal and humbling post of yours it made me tear up…It reminds me of my exact thoughts and words from my younger days watching nights like the ones you just described and how much humiliation I felt, how protective I felt over my little brother watching bitterness and alcoholism destroy the 2 people we loved the most: our God-fearing and providing parents. Being young and in private schools, I was taught to believe those things don’t mix, that you either live by the law and make up for your lack or God won’t reward you. Persecutors have always been after me and my family in that religious arena who knew us but for as little as I really knew about God, I never in my heart believed He was ever like that. It wasn’t something I had to convince myself of either, it was inherent and it was very easy back then to brush off the criticisms. What blows my mind though is that even though I didn’t seek to know Him in those years when persecution didn’t bother me, nor did I focus on everything I was doing, I look back and see so much unmerited favor, peace and blessing in my first 2 years of college. For the first time I felt like I knew who I was, but being mediocre was always an internal hindrance because the standard for being known and popular on Huntsville’s campus was being greek which I became out of some people I already knew from high school. I made so many friends and got a lot of respect in my sorority, but i didn’t feel the passion or desperation for those priorities. It wasn’t a faith-focused decision, because I was still lost and confused and knew that I just didn’t care for that drama/alcohol scene at the bars. I have always had energy and charisma for fun but i never found it there- When i see to this day, the same friends make the same mistakes and go through that misery over and over I thank God for His grace that delivered me from having to go through that. Back when i made my decision in my head to exit from my sisterhood’s chapter, it was only 2 weeks after I saw you for the first time and God’s voice shook me in my seat. When you wrapped up your sermon and left the pulpit, “divine desperation” is exactly what I felt, I wasn’t thinking anymore when i chased you down afterwards crying like a pathetic fool (which I never would do in public especially to people I don’t know.) To be honest, I don’t even remember the last few minutes of your sermon because I was in such a spiritual-recognition mode, i was numb. I didn’t know what that feeling was then but I was humbled so much I couldn’t even think to approach you, but an urge shot through me because I wanted to run towards whatever you brought and tell you my gratitude and beg you to keep inspiring me and my generation. I wasn’t sick then, I was perfectly content- but mediocre wasn’t what God wanted for me. It is ironic that disease, addiction, depression and the worst- rejection from the ones i love- has been brought upon me the more God has shown me who He is and His divine wisdom these past two years. Psalm 139 has burned in me ever since 2009, when David said “Where can I go from your spirit?…even if I lay my bed in hell, You are there. How precious are Your thoughts of me!” Like Paul said, I am convinced that NOTHING can separate me from that love. He said He chose me, not the other way around. Though this world holds nothing of interest for me and my soul is ready to leave this place for better, God has in an unspeakable way stopped my mind and provided me with effortless strength on my part. Little did I know that in this process, He was speaking life into people around me through me. They came running to me, calling me their mentor and giving my spirit much more I feel than they say I’ve given them. God has been healing me as I’ve healed others through Him. I am so aware and conscious of His presence and voice now, He has made every fleshly infirmity and unthinkable victory possible without me even realizing it or THINKING about it until later. The only need I pray and ask Him for anymore in regards to myself is for Him to keep talking to me and holding my hand. He is so real, and in the meantime He has met every need before I’ve even asked and has been blessing so many of my friends without me even being consiously aware- I don’t think about that when He is being so good to me…all I want to do in those moments is praise Him! When I hear Him now, I have no choice but to do what His holy spirit prompts me to do, no matter how rediculous it may seem. When I see fruit spring forth almost immediately after, l know it’s divine. He makes every weakness His strength, and He is SO worthy to be praised. There is no other joy that can compare to His supernatural peace and presence walking through this cursed world. I love ya doc and I thank God for you everyday.
Hi Family,
I pray this youtube satisfies your thirst….
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmohF9HW6Ec
Have a divine date with our Redeemer….
I love you in Christ,
TRuth